Catania March 29, 2010
A: "Tomorrow come to the theater?" S: "Why not!"
Annuccia, the dietician at the center where I worked until a few days ago, before being brutally dismissed, he has two tickets, kindly gave them to him one of its customers. A guy who works in the strange world of entertainment and I think that has a blatant crush on Anna.
I remembered him perfectly because I had set the appointment, when I was still a job.
My answer came a bit 'so. Without thinking twice. I said yes because my mood is not very good lately and to be alone at home I do not want.
I do not have wondered what a show I saw and I have not asked. It comes out? Well, whatever you do will be perfect or if it will be an evening we will have imperfect in two. Because the logic of "common means ill joy "is something.
only be learned in front of the Metropolitan that I witnessed the "Marchese del Grillo". Starring: Pippo Franco. The king of Bagaglino.
Oh, I thought, why him?!? I can not stand the sight! All those bad women half naked in the middle of comedians who can only use one penny humor that uses double meanings to a laugh. I see the king of Bagaglino. Me, I always thought that plus a good comic is less need to talk about sex. That make you laugh with sex because it is easy to laugh before the joke laugh to exorcise embarrassment. I, the comic with the sexual repertoire I have always considered the series B.
All right, I said, better than staying home. Then we are guests, not even pay!
The first act is soporific. My head gives dangerously forward under the weight of sleep that clings to the neck and the foreman makes you hopelessly pour forward and when you realize the embarrassment is rampant and you begin to look around to see if someone if n ' is aware of your small, shameful secret nap.
I take a cup of coffee, hoping to wake up. And I wake up.
The second act is more urgent, some smiles and tears it with a frequency that starts to become noticeable.
The play ends with this line:
The husband says to his wife "Dear wife, I have 54 years and I'm in love with a girl of 18, I leave and go to live with her "and she says : " Dear husband, I also have 54 years and I'm in love with a boy of 18. I I leave and go to live with him and wanting to clarify the 54 in 18 there comes a time even while 18 in 54 ... "
applause and laughter. I incredulos rest, ten minutes later I was still using his hands to try to understand how many times the 18 came in 54. And I think that I got the hives, as every time I hear talk of numbers. But that's another story that I have already told HERE
Annuccia pronounced after the show: "Escape"!
We looked around, his client was not there, pointing out there but we find it before!
S: "And where this has popped?"
A: "Silvy we do now?"
S: "We must Annu talk, after we have also got tickets ... do you want? Partially sighted, and pretend to slip from the emergency? "
A:" Silvy Oh my God! "
The customer approaches:
C: "So girls, like the show?
S: "Siiiiiiiiiii (we were asleep, then came to me hives and tomorrow I play 18 and 54 and if I win the placement will not go!)
C: "Have you come with me, I present Pippo Franco"
A: "Siiiiiiiiiiiii (but not)"
C: "It 's the first time that you know a famous person?"
S: "Siiiiiiiiiiiiii (and should I care about me, I want to go home, tomorrow I have to go to the placement that I need another job, unless Pippo Franco does not want me to pay the rent for April!) "
C:" So are you honored to do something for the first time, usually the ' age of the first times ranging from 14 to 20 "
A:" I believe that you never stop learning and do some things for the first time! "
We go behind the scenes. We are greeted by a disturbing character which I immediately dubbed PeCcottesia (PerCortesia).
PeCcottesia is a man of about sixty low and rough, probably responsible for dismantling the set. We are welcomed by screaming on a ladder in Catania:
"Pe cottesia n'ata gghiri Uora you! Ri cà nun goes, livuatevi re ddocu "(there you please go now! This was not passed, get out!)
PeCcottesia began every sentence with "please" but that there was only one track or in the manner or in what he said, seemed to be talking to the first follower of Berlusconi that speaks of ' love triumphing over hatred and envy and love do not miss it puts an ounce in the speeches he does!
A & S: "We must meet Pippo Franco!"
"Pe cottesia v'ata allivari first falls n'lignu n'da head about you! Fozzi clear "(you have to please you before you raise a beam falls on your head! Force clear!)
A & S: "But we were invited!"
"Au, eg cottesia, iu is a cunt chiuru there n'ata gghiri beam ! Iddu not cheap to Vidiri nuddu "(Oh, please, I close the door, you have to go there now! He does not want to talk to anyone!)
slams the door behind him and before chiudersela shows us a threatening stick.
S: "run away Annu PeCcottesia c'ammazza, this is Jack the Ripper of Noantri! "
A:" Silvy we can not! "
S:" I have to die to meet Annu Pippo Franco ?
Finally PeCcottesia rooms where the truck had loaded all the stuff, is to pave the way for a customer of Anne comes and takes us to recover from the star of the evening.
Faced with Pippo Anna panic:
A: "I know that he follows a strict diet that is more than just a philosophy of life, now I will talk about food, I tell him?"
S: "nodded dietician you, I was the secretary!"
A: "What I invent?"
S: "That we are what we eat!"
A: "From Silvy please do not joke! My client spoke to the method we follow, he does not agree with eating the mushrooms! "
S:" Why not? "
A:" Why are molds and poison the body "
S:" So Goofy is never a good meal of mushrooms? "
A:" No! "
S:" Then tell him that he does not know what you lose! "
A: "Silvy, be serious!"
S, "Annu tell them that mushrooms are low-calorie, then who cares if they are full of toxins, mold, because it means they are unclean animal and plant resources , disgusting parasites of the plant kingdom! Tell him that are good and do not make you fat and advise them to have them with a plate of linguine! "
While I was joking with Anna and I make fun of her embarrassment, which was then mine too, I watched closely I had not Horace, who never liked and began to change his mind. I had already a bit 'changed during the show, which the theater is a completely different story. Dismissed the role of the king of Bagaglino is certainly a stage animal, perfect in that role. I find him in front of this wiry man with this nose pinocchio have to be his son, but Geppetto! This mild-mannered man with a smile on his face that always shows a calm and an enviable balance, you always look in his eyes when he speaks and shows himself with all available and adorable. Start me endless sympathy.
comes our turn, shook his hand and then the embarrassment freezes a little 'dialogue. Anna spoke to the customer presenting as those working in the center of nutrition and dietetics where he addressed him. I sat thinking that all I wanted to talk about diet except that I do not want to hear any more talk for the rest of my days. The customer brings the problem mushrooms. Anna stumbles:
A: "Mushrooms are low calorie"
P: "They are full of toxins, to dispose of the toxins of a meal of mushrooms will take approximately 3 months, we are what we eat! "
S:" (Anna See, I told him that you had to say!) "
C:" The doctor made me lose seven pounds in seven weeks! "
P:" It seems a movie! "
C:" It had to be seven pounds in seven days ... "
S:" It is going to die! From that's okay ... the similarity effect is still "
Goofy laughs, I think it's so nice that?
P, "Then you follow with the work you do is always a healthy diet?"
S "(I do not do any more work! If you are what I eat nutella, setteveli and slush! At least you can say it is not a sweet person! And I've got the stars in the blood of the pan of stars that we hope they find a bottleneck somewhere else artery bits fit together and it makes me 'na thrombosis!) "
A:" Of course we must set a good example! "
S: ("Annuccia Spit it out, even the fries that you have declined during the interval while you talk and tell him that those lying helpless on the bottom of your bag!")
A: ("Shut up !!!") Silvia
sbellico laughter While I imagine the scene where Anna's purse falls on the floor and slide the chips in front of the disbelieving eyes of the individual customer and Pippo Franco, comes the proposal:
C: "I'd love you to join us at that dinner
S: "Thank you very much, but I have to make a up early tomorrow ... (the placement is always a row, I need a piece of paper to submit an application for unemployment!)"
Anna took me aside: "When we recapitalization??"
Okay, let's go to dinner with Goofy!
leave the backstage of the theater and head to the restaurant.
The good company was as follows: I, Annuccia, the individual customer, Goofy, The Producer of the show and two women in every shot that I did not understand that c'azzeccavano.
S: "Anna, are dressed as a truck driver!"
A: "I do not complain I've got a tight shirt, you see the rolls ... what an ugly picture: the dietitian fat! "
S:" But you're not from fat, the rolls come out only if you sit down! "
A:" But restaurant you are sitting! Oh God! "
We settle . The waiters are unheard of kindness, they treat us like we were all stars. They offer us a drink, appetizer, take away our coats.
Topics dinner: the diet and horoscope. But I say, we are at dinner with Pippo Franco, I have things to tell ... because we need to discuss more mundane topics that there are two! Let's talk about politics, entertainment, music, books, cinema! No??
individual customer launches into a monologue about the signs of the Zodiac: The lion is strong and determined, the moody and sensitive Cancer, Scorpio is a magnetic sign! See if Anna is scorpion!
No please, stop, change the subject!
C: "You have an enviable line! How do you, follow a healthy diet? "
S: 'No way, now that no longer work in the center of the diet I can say: I eat bad, very bad ... crackers for lunch (which annoys me to cook) and desserts galore all day! "
Goofy looks at me as if I were an alien, I specify:" Before I preach well and good scratch now that no longer work in the field of nutrition can preach well and quietly scratching badly, is a luxury that I like to give me, you know ... after two years to say that my diet is healthy that I can think about to break the lies before it ends in the group of liars! "
C:" You have a great metabolism! "
S: "hyperactive, more than anything else!"
C: "Lucky you! And you, Anna, how many times a week you eat sweets? "
A:" One time! "
S:" Ahaha "(He once per day! ! E 'from home every afternoon between a client and the other takes a slice of pandoro kindly donated by Miss eats herbs and it spreads over a pound of nutella! Anne of the truth, let you sit and rolls make you hello from the bottom! "
C: "Why are you laughing your colleague?"
A: "Um ... change the subject ..."
C: "He's gay" is pointing to the individual customer Writer!
A: "Good for him! (Which we give a damn for us!) "
" One says to sodomize sodomized: Look, you're the fag! "Pippo involved in a tone of teasing!
Laughter.
"He only eats bananas, zucchini, carrots, cucumbers and" precise individual customer always pointing Manufacturer Gay.
S: "Well we finished the phallic fruit and vegetables, eat something else ... no?"
C: "No, no to him just like that ... and even the cannoli, especially those with chocolate! "
The debate degenerates at an alarming rate, meanwhile, has run Pippo estranged (as he's wrong) and started talking to Whole Woman Shot In the diet that follows, I between the story of the sexual-food habits of trying to steal Gay Producer something. Goofy does not eat red meat, the toxins did not drink coffee, have toxins, do not eat farmed fish, the toxins did not take alcohol, are toxins, do not drink milk, the toxins did not accept meals, their toxins, which does not eat the mushrooms already knew.
What the hell eats that? Pineapple! He ate only un'ananas! Why it is so thin that Skeleton seems, however, kale, is a skeleton without toxins!
Woman Shot In All comes out with the story that a friend of his, a physics says that we are all the crystals ...
Goofy smiles "Yes, we who work in TV, we are all of the crystals, liquids, though!"
Laughter.
S: "You are a bunch of pixels!"
Laughter.
"However, the motion is important! Woman Shot In All-ago-I do belly dancing! "
'It is true that you no pants?" Concerned individual customer requests.
"Noooo! But you say! "
" I'm sure they gave me for sure! "
" You're too physical! "
S: "What a nice way to say it is a maniac! But I would break a lance in his favor ... before, while you were talking with Goofy, he has become in a speech dwelled on the magnetism of the scorpions and then said to be a person who tends to let go and get involved with the feelings as wave. Perhaps, then, is also a bit 'deeper than would have us believe ... "
" Thank you - involved him-but if you do strike a blow for him, "and indicates a new producer Gay. "He is interested in the spear!"
Bah ... then you are just stupid, and I will defend you continue with this story? But then that may well be gay in peace!
Pippo assists adrift of our conversations without intervening too much but always remaining attentive and smiling. I felt embarrassed for him.
The dinner draws to a close. Goofy has always been this welcoming smile, never false, empathy oozes from every pore. We greet each other warmly with a handshake. It makes us the best wishes for the life to come.
I look at him and walks away and I think they are three in the morning tomorrow with the cabbage that I get up to go to the placement. But you would like to spend the evening talking of phallic vegetables, diet and zodiac signs, escape the stick PeCcottesia discourse on belly dancers and no pants?
And then I also have two numbers to go play the lottery. If I win I send him a basket full of vegetables to producer Gay phallic and full of Pineapple biological Mr. Goofy. And to the individual customer's do the numbers so Anna will not be forced to organize dinners embarrassing to impress her.
and Goofy, I'm sure, will thank me.
"Ah Foo, I write. Did I saved from the individual customer ... Now you can do something for me: take the url of this blog and let me become famous! And eat 'na granita you need it! I offer even if I do not win the lottery with your numbers ... because if you have made me lose even one day of my unemployment that still can not afford me! "
Silvia.
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